Monday, April 9, 2012

Beware: disgusting story ahead

My mom has been sick with a nasty cold for the past week and a half and unfortunately she wasn't feeling up to church or dinner with the family. So like the good daughter I am, I brought her some food from the Easter feast, an Easter basket with some treats and a little potted flower to brighten her day.


Yeah, I'm so sweet aren't I?

Anyway, I rode the elevator up to her 3rd floor apartment since I had my hands full. I noticed when I stepped out of the elevator that it smelled as though someone really needed to throw away their garbage. I was praying the smell wasn't coming from my mom's place. But thankfully, when I opened her door, all I could smell was fresh air. Phew!

When I left, I took the stairs. And on my way down I noticed something on one of the steps. As I got closer, it sort of looked like a turtle. Or a big sock stuffed with something. Until I got next to it and discovered it was the BIGGEST TURD I have EVER seen in my LIFE!!!!! Right there, on the carpeted stairs of my mother's apartment building.

I was so disgusted and appalled yet amazed at what I was standing there looking at. I ran down to second floor and knocked on my niece's apartment. I was going to drag her up to see this huge turd, to make sure I wasn't imagining things, but she didn't answer the door. So I texted her.

"Are you at home?"

"No. Why?"

And I told her the story.

"Like from a dog or what?"

"No way. It's way too big."

"I hope you picked it up."

hahaha........yeah RIGHT!

So I'm sitting here pondering how a turd ended up on the stairs and I can only think of two things:
1) it fell out of some one's garbage as they were taking it down to the dumpster, although that seems unlikely since there was no other sign of garbage anywhere
2) some sick human being actually took a dump on the stairs

And it couldn't possibly have been from an animal. I have a giant dog at home. I know what giant dog poop looks like. This was not doggy doo.


Oh, Happy Easter ;)

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