I love my kids.
But sometimes, I need a break from them. Not a long break, like a week or anything, just an hour or two will do the trick most of the time.
It's hard being a stay-at-home mom sometimes. You are with them ALL the time, day and night. Except when they are at school, but I still have one at home (she's only in school 5 hours a week). It's still pretty nice when it's just her and I. Typically it's when all 3 are home that it can get chaotic with the whining, fighting, hyper activity, etc.
And working moms feel the stress too. They are working hard all day, at a job, with a boss, deadlines and pressures, and they have to come home to more work. Cleaning, cooking, taking care of children. Hopefully they have good helping husbands, like mine.
In the middle of all that needs to be done, sometimes we forget about ourselves, and how important it is to take "me time". I really hate that phrase. But it's true, you HAVE to MAKE time for yourself. Otherwise, you get run down, over worked, over stressed, you are crabby and short tempered and miserable. Is that the kind of person you want to be? Is that the kind of mom you want your kids to remember?
Some woman think they can do it all, and maybe some can. Although I don't know of any who can do it all without feeling a little overwhelmed at times and get just a touch crabby in the process. It's natural. But what I don't understand, are the woman who think they can't leave their child's side. Can't take an hour to get away, go shopping, read a book, workout, just be alone in peace to recharge their batteries. Maybe they think it's selfish because being a mother is a "full time job".
But I don't think it's selfish. You aren't doing your kids any favors if you never get a chance to de-stress and wind up being MOMZILLA because of it. No sense in bragging about never spending a night away from the kiddies to be with the hubby, if you find yourself so focused on the kids that your marriage suffers. And when a marriage suffers, the kids suffer too. No point in always talking about how you live your life for your kids but behind the scenes you're losing your temper because you never get a moment of peace.
If you've ever flown anywhere, you'll remember how the flight attendant tells you to put your own oxygen mask on first, before assisting young children. Well, look at life the same way. You need to take care of YOU so that you are able to take care of the kids. Don't feel guilty about taking time to do something for yourself - whatever it is that helps you feel refreshed and ready to take on the busy schedules and the whiny kids. Because you'll be better able to handle the stressful situations without losing it and doing or saying something you'll regret.
I'm no supermom. I need breaks. My kids need me to take breaks. I enjoy them, I look forward to them, I don't feel guilty about taking them. Because I KNOW that I am a better mom for it.
Believe me, there are MANY times I have acted stupidly as a parent. Kids don't come with instructions and every child has different needs, and therefore requires you to adjust your parenting accordingly. One mom's way of doing things might work for her but not for you. Use your mom instincts and do what you know in your gut is right. And don't forget about YOU! You are important too.
Ok, maybe I am a supermom. How else do I explain being able to produce such beautiful human beings *wink wink* ;)
2 comments:
Do you really need to preach to me to take time for myself? Is it because you want a girls day again? I am ready for one I know that! Let me know what works for you.
If it's something I feel passionately about, then YES, I need to preach!! And YES, let's have a girls day!! You're schedule is probably more hectic than mine so whenever you feel like it, I'll make time for you ;)
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